article: romantic myths debunked?

 
Got your eye on someone to love? You're more likely to attract your intended by displaying your sense of humor than by displaying your intelligence.
 
Being wildly successful (no matter how much money you make) won't get you as far as you think if you're setting office hour endurance records. And if you adhere to some supposed "rules" about acting cool and distant when you're really interested, expect to see your would-be honey on someone else's arm.
 
Those are just a few of the surprising results of a May survey of more than 1600 US adults conducted by online dating service Match.com, which set out to discover what makes singles' hearts beat these days. 

Who we love, and why we love them, can change over time," said Trish McDermott, Vice President of Romance and resident dating expert at Match.com. "Qualities like stability and predictability, long hailed as 'humdrum' or 'boring' by some people, have become romantic commodities in today's search for an ideal mate. These changes are as much about our life stages and internal wants and needs, as they are about the external forces that shape our lives and perceptions."

The survey revealed that:

• 70% of singles believe they're most likely to fall in love with someone who makes them laugh; only 30% expressed a preference for someone who makes them think.
• Women are more likely to love nice guys; only 28% are likely to fall for a bad boy over a nice guy.
  Predictability has never been more exciting: 62% of those surveyed believe they'll most likely fall in love with someone who is a planner, stable, fairly predictable and not a risk-taker.
• We don't like workaholics, even if they are incredibly successful: 91% of those surveyed reported that they tend to fall in love with a moderately successful career person with a balanced life rather than a workaholic who enjoys an incredibly successful professional life.
• We are more likely to love a talker: 60% of those surveyed said they are more likely to love someone with a gift for self-expression, while only 40% professed a preference for a great listener.
• Playing "hard-to-get" seems to have played out: 60% of those surveyed report they would most likely fall for a person they already know is head-over-heels interested in them rather than someone they have to chase.

In addition to the survey results, Match.com announced findings from an analysis of the results of more than 3 million people who have taken its Personality Test, used to match single's temperaments more closely. The results indicate that most of us bring several quirks to romantic relationships. In fact, more than half the singles tested described some potentially frustrating traits, including inclinations toward being stubborn, jealous, clingy, distant or moody.

"Everyone can be high maintenance at times, but it's our imperfections and quirks that make us unique and loveable," said Dr. Mark Thompson, CEO & Lead Inventor at weAttract.com, developer of the science used in Match.com's Personality Test. "The real key to a successful and loving relationship is to find someone who likes to do the maintenance you require."

The most common quirks, according to Dr. Thompson, include:

• Being too social at times — talking too loud, too fast or staying on the go too much.
  
• Being too big-hearted — being swayed too much by emotion or trying too hard to make your friends and family happy.
  
• Letting ideas and creativity get in the way of practical matters or becoming so focused on ideas and plans for the future or a new project that you lose track of the day-to-day details of life.

But it seems we all accept those traits and quirks, at least in moderation. Approximately 80% of singles who register at Match.com today indicate they are seeking a long-term, committed relationship or marriage. And in the company's January 2004 survey of more than 800 married people in two distinct groups-those who met on Match.com and those who met through any means other than an online dating service — people in both groups cited "quality of character" as the attribute that made the respondent fall in love with his or her spouse, while "sense of humor" was the second choice.

Findings also revealed that online daters are likely to get married more quickly than those who meet offline; 72% of the Match.com couples married after dating for a year or less, while 36% of the other couples married as quickly."

Despite the challenges many singles feel to find stable, loving relationships and the sometimes controversial state of marriage in America today, many of us still hope to find, and live happily ever after in, loving, committed marriages," McDermott concluded.

From MSN Personal

 

p/s: bollocks, - bollocks! - is what i think...

p/p/s: but it would be nice, though.